It’s Mother’s Day, FWIW

It’s no secret that I’m not a fan of Mother’s Day. I always struggled with it as a younger adult because I didn’t have kids, didn’t want biological kids, and felt inherently that Mother’s Day was the world’s way to point out that I wasn’t the “ideal woman.” Ideal women prioritize reproduction. Once I becameContinue reading “It’s Mother’s Day, FWIW”

Heartache

I just got a call from the agency that I deeply appreciate having gotten. Years ago we told our homefinder (basically our case worker) that if ever a child we’ve fostered comes back into foster care, we want to be called first. It’s happened twice now. The first time I got a call it wasContinue reading “Heartache”

Struggling to Parent Sunny

I’ve written before about how Sunny is a difficult kid to parent. I’m not sure I’ve really emphasized that enough, though. Folks, I’m struggling with parenting her fairly. Sunny has learned, through no fault of her own, to be manipulative and pushy. Those were attributes that got her needs met when she was home withContinue reading “Struggling to Parent Sunny”

Dealing with Uncertainty

Foster care is nothing if not filled with uncertainty. We have 10-year-old Sunny with us still. She’s been here 519 days counting today. She says she still wants to go home, but my suspicion is that she would have a very hard time transitioning back to her old style of family life. Her family isContinue reading “Dealing with Uncertainty”

Christmas and other good things

I haven’t posted in a while so it feels like time for a general update since I am not feeling inspired with brilliant topics for posts. We are lucky in this fostering house that we currently have a foster kid who doesn’t have a lot of trauma associated with Christmas. Being Muslim, Sunny never reallyContinue reading “Christmas and other good things”

Life Carries On

It’s funny. I’d been longing to adopt Sprout for so long, and so worried it would not happen, that when it did actually happen I was a bit gobsmacked for a day or two. Could it really have taken place?! Finally?! But then, life just carried on, as it has a way of doing! NothingContinue reading “Life Carries On”

National Adoption Day

The Event On Friday, November 17, 2023, we adopted our little Sprout at the County’s National Adoption Day event! HOORAY!!! The event was… chaotic. I know we should appreciate everything that happened and was given to Sprout in the course of the day, but in some ways I wish we’d had an adoption in theContinue reading “National Adoption Day”

A Spooky Room for Sprout

We’ve been foster parents for almost 8 years, always in the same three bedroom house. Well, now a four bedroom house! There’s a master bedroom, and that’s stayed ours all along. But the other two bedrooms on the second floor have gone through a million different permutations. Kiddo was our first foster kid, and sheContinue reading “A Spooky Room for Sprout”

Sunny’s Need to Belong

The subject of belonging came up for me recently when I listened to a We Can Do Hard Things podcast called “Being Left Out: Navigating that Lifelong Ache.” In the episode, Glennon, Abby, and Amanda talk about the need for feeling like we belong, and how fundamental that feeling is to our survival. In essence,Continue reading “Sunny’s Need to Belong”

Hair Day Catchup

I’m sitting with Kiddo as she gets her hair braided professionally by a Black woman for the first time. I screwed up to start with by not buying enough hair for braiding in, and Seth had to rescue us by going to the store to buy more. But aside from that glitch, it’s going great!Continue reading “Hair Day Catchup”