trauma

It’s Mother’s Day, FWIW

It’s no secret that I’m not a fan of Mother’s Day. I always struggled with it as a younger adult because I didn’t have kids, didn’t want biological kids, and felt inherently that Mother’s Day was the world’s way to point out that I wasn’t the “ideal woman.” Ideal women prioritize reproduction. Once I becameContinue reading “It’s Mother’s Day, FWIW”

Heartache

I just got a call from the agency that I deeply appreciate having gotten. Years ago we told our homefinder (basically our case worker) that if ever a child we’ve fostered comes back into foster care, we want to be called first. It’s happened twice now. The first time I got a call it wasContinue reading “Heartache”

Time on Hold

We’re all on the struggle bus right now. For one thing, we are waiting for good weather eagerly, and being thwarted. So far NY has offered us an earthquake and an eclipse for April, and today there’s a bit of sun, but we are all feeling cooped up and are wanting SUN and WARMTH enoughContinue reading “Time on Hold”

Struggling to Parent Sunny

I’ve written before about how Sunny is a difficult kid to parent. I’m not sure I’ve really emphasized that enough, though. Folks, I’m struggling with parenting her fairly. Sunny has learned, through no fault of her own, to be manipulative and pushy. Those were attributes that got her needs met when she was home withContinue reading “Struggling to Parent Sunny”

Acting up in public

Last weekend my husband was working, but I fearlessly plowed ahead and took Sunny and Sprout to the Finger Lakes Chapter of Little People of America’s holiday party. Let me start this by praising this organization. I’ve written about them before regarding a baseball game we took the girls to during the summer. Being surroundedContinue reading “Acting up in public”

Sunny’s Need to Belong

The subject of belonging came up for me recently when I listened to a We Can Do Hard Things podcast called “Being Left Out: Navigating that Lifelong Ache.” In the episode, Glennon, Abby, and Amanda talk about the need for feeling like we belong, and how fundamental that feeling is to our survival. In essence,Continue reading “Sunny’s Need to Belong”

Foster Parent Life Hacks

A post about foster parenting hacks went up on one of the many foster parenting Facebook pages I follow. It gave me the inspiration to do my own list, as follows: Preparation prior to placements: Get waterproof mattress covers for ALL beds. They make ones that don’t make annoying crinkly noises now. They go onContinue reading “Foster Parent Life Hacks”

Hair Day Catchup

I’m sitting with Kiddo as she gets her hair braided professionally by a Black woman for the first time. I screwed up to start with by not buying enough hair for braiding in, and Seth had to rescue us by going to the store to buy more. But aside from that glitch, it’s going great!Continue reading “Hair Day Catchup”